Contents of Our Fridge

(after I've been gone for three weeks, and Preston has been gone for five days) include, but are not limited to: milk, Beast (from Preston's bachelor weekend), moldy baked ziti, hummus that is also probably moldy, eggs, salad dressing, Perrier, Diet Coke, chocolate syrup, and SO MUCH LEFTOVER WEDDING ALCOHOL.

This does not a balanced meal make. Trips to Trader Joe's, Target, etc. are in our immediate future, since I can't think of an appetizing dish that involves chocolate syrup, eggs, and Perrier. SHOCKING I know. Or maybe I could just drink my calories by finishing off all of the Beast. Or, instead of that, I could just drink straight AWFULNESS. Because I think they taste about the same.