Confessions

1. The other day I was about to eat my pack of applesauce at my carrel in the library (eating in the library is forbidden to begin with). When I realized I had forgotten a spoon, I spent a good minute considering how sketchy I would look if someone walked by and I was eating it with my fingers.

2. Yesterday I wanted to wear jeans and riding boots, but my jeans were dirty (as in, visibly dirty). Instead of a) choosing another outfit, or b) wearing pants other than jeans, I decided to wear my capri jeans with the boots, which basically meant that I couldn't bend over all day, or my pants would pop out of my boots.

3. Instead of doing my homework this afternoon, I made chocolate chip bars.

4. Then I ate four of them.

5. I was originally supposed to go running with Penelope this evening, but a recent brouhaha with my MIL reached a fever pitch this afternoon, and I decided to opt out of the run and drink lots of wine instead. After deciding this, I was walking out the door of my building when my neighbor, seeing my workout gear and running shoes said, "You going to workout?" To which I replied, "No, I went running earlier today." WHICH WAS A LIE.

6. Then I told him that I was just running out to the store. I failed to mention that I was going to the wine store.

7. I still have at least twelve hours of work to do for class tomorrow, but am currently halfway into the bottle of wine and watching Make Me A Supermodel.

8. When I'm sad, I like to lie down on the rug next to the dogs and cry. I put my head on the floor, let Ness lick all of my tears away, and pretend that her tongue has never touched anything but SUNSHINE AND UNICORNS.

9. I still have Christmas thank-you notes I haven't sent.

10. I offered to have all of the first-year grad students for dinner tomorrow night AND host a prospective graduate student for the next two nights, and I am seriously regretting both of those offers. Because I am a terrible person. Slash really, really tired.

11. I'm a healthy girl. I have ten fingers, ten toes, my sight, my hearing, etc. etc. etc. I get it. I'm lucky. Yet all I can think when I look in the full-length mirror in the morning is: I HATE MY KNEES.

12. Damnit. I can no longer blame all of my problems on my parents.